


Brave New World

by Polarnacht



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Aftercare, Anal Sex, Bottom Alec Lightwood, Breathplay, Coming Untouched, Cuddling & Snuggling, First Kiss, First Time, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Light Dom/sub, Loss of Virginity, Love Confessions, M/M, Marking, Marking Bruises, Parabatai, Possessive Jace Wayland, Possessive Sex, Smut, Top Jace Wayland, parabatai love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:41:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27654970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Polarnacht/pseuds/Polarnacht
Summary: Alec never thought that it would come to this. That he would fight against Jace and not with him. But they are facing each other with raised blades, both determined to win. It’s the last thing Alec wants. But what he truly wants he cannot have: Jace. And not only Jace as his Parabatai, but as his lover. However, when he presses his blade to Jace’s throat, and Jace looks up at him with huge eyes, Alec realizes that maybe Jace wants the same thing as he does. They just have to figure out how to get there...
Relationships: Alec Lightwood/Jace Wayland
Comments: 12
Kudos: 174
Collections: Jalec, Malace 101





	Brave New World

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kissa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kissa/gifts).



> For Kissa: You're awesome. 💙
> 
> Jessa, thank you for being my beta. You make my writing so much better 💙

**Brave New World**

Alec felt alone. He felt more alone than he had in years, probably he had never felt more alone in his entire life. Especially because he was not really alone but surrounded by others. Surrounded by people who were against him but should be on his side – by his sister Izzy, by Jace. His fucking Parabatai. But he hadn’t felt much of their bond lately. Not since the little girl had stumbled into their lives and Jace had been busy following her every move, disregarding Alec and all written and unwritten rules of the Shadow World.

It was true, Alec loved rules, more than the others did. But some rules were there for a reason. Some rules just kept you alive. But Clary ignored all of them, not knowing of the possible dangers. And Jace? He also ignored all rules, though he was very well aware of the dangers. And Alec hated it. He hated that he was the one who had to scold the others. He hated that he was the one who had to risk his life goal, of becoming the next Head of the Institute, to save the others. But foremost, he hated the feeling of being left out in the cold.

It seemed that, next to Clary, he didn’t have a place in Jace’s life anymore. At least not at his priority. Alec couldn’t remember when he had fallen in love with Jace. If it had been the instant Jace had barged in on his training room and lectured him about how to handle a bow correctly. Or if it had been when Jace had curled up into him in the darkest of nights and confessed that even the greatest Shadowhunter of their generation was sometimes scared, and therefore needed protection. Or if it had been later, when he had realized that Jace’s smile could light up the world – at least his world.

He just remembered that he had. That he _was_ in love with Jace. And though he knew very well that Jace didn’t love him back, it had been enough. Because they were Parabatai and he was important to Jace. He was Jace’s person, as much as Jace was his. It was fine to keep his further feelings hidden, buried deep inside him in a spot only he had access to. Just for himself. To look at them from time to time and marvel at the possibilities that would never come true.

But Alec didn’t feel like this anymore. Recently, he didn’t feel safe in his relationship with Jace. And feeling safe was the one thing Alec craved even more than being with Jace for real. Born into a political marriage of parents who had never possessed the ability to love, or who had lost love a long time ago, safety was never something Alec could count on. He needed to work hard for any sign of affection. There was nothing unconditional about the love he received, it was always tied to him reaching a certain goal or fulfilling a specific task. And it always felt like love was taken away the moment he failed.

This had changed when Jace had crashed into his world and smashed it into pieces, just to build it up again with Jace in the center of it. Jace had been there for him. He had healed his cuts and bruises without giving him the feeling that he was weak for being injured in the first place. He had his back. Against any demon or Downworlder, but also against his parents. Jace _loved_ him. Just as he was, with all the countless flaws and imperfections. Alec was sure of that. Maybe not in the way his heart ached for, but he _loved_ him. At least he had been sure of it. Until Clary had entered his world and crushed it into pieces yet again. Just to build it up without Alec in the picture at all.

Alec hated it. He hated how Izzy and Jace followed her around and did one reckless thing after the other. Getting nearly killed in the process. Not just once but several times, until he came and saved the day. Of course, without getting gratitude in response. Alec hated that his feelings had been dragged into the open by the memory demon but he hated even more that Clary made fun of him for this. He hated that all his political ambitions were crumbling down with every second he didn’t get a grip on his siblings, and the situation.

The fact that they not only went behind his back to save his sister’s lover - something he was nearly used to by now - but went openly _against_ him too, was the final thing that made Alec snap. Jace had gone from having his back to stabbing him in the same with a dagger – at least this was how he felt the moment he realized what was going on. He couldn’t see their reasons. Valid reasons, he was sure they were, if only he could see them. But he couldn’t. He could just feel the burning rage of betrayal, humiliation and loss.

Alec had never imagined that one day he would go against Jace. That one day, their sparring would become a fight for real. But here he was, holding a blade in hand and charging against Jace. And he had to admit, it was satisfying. It was satisfying to see his own feeling of betrayal mirrored in Jace’s mismatched eyes. It was satisfying to feel Jace’s nose break under his fist when he punched him. It was satisfying to see the blood on his face.

They were both panting heavily from fighting each other. Of course not to kill, but to win. Alec’s chest hurt where Jace’s kick had hit him and small drops of blood were running down his face from a cut above his eyebrow. But he ignored all of it. He was just fixated on countering every blow and hit, on being ahead of Jace just that tiny bit that would make the difference. To both of their surprises, he succeeded. When Jace tried to kick at him again, he grabbed his ankle, spun him around and smashed him to the floor, landing on top of him.

Jace landed on his back with a grunt, the impact with Alec’s added weight on him squishing all air out of his lungs, his blade falling to the floor uselessly beside them. He was at Alec’s complete mercy.

“Alec.” Jace looked up at him with wide eyes that displayed the surprise.

Alec gritted his teeth forcefully. _How dare he._ How dare Jace say his name like this, like he was still the center of his world and not already pushed to the side and replaced. How dare he say his name like _that_ now, after days of saying his name like he was an annoying fly that needed to be displaced.

Alec was way too angry for Jace to say his name like that. Instead of responding, he punched Jace again. The surprised yelp that fell from Jace’s lips was even more satisfying than the fight before. It fulfilled a need Alec had not been aware of having. And he was definitely not proud of having it.

Slowly, he let his blade roam over Jace’s throat, starting from his ear and working inwards, over his Adam’s apple and over to the other side. His hand was steady, way steadier than he felt. He let it run with enough pressure for Jace to feel it but without cutting him. He was fine making Jace bleed with his fist, but with a blade it felt too impersonal. The blade was just a warning. That he could. That Jace had him nearly there. That he would.

“Alec,” Jace said again, but this time Alec saw only trust in his eyes. No surprise, merely trust and something akin to love. Instead of fighting back, or trying anything else to disarm him, Jace just tilted his head back in the ultimate and most beautiful submissive gesture Alec had ever seen. The way Jace nearly pressed into the sharp edge of the blade, fully trusting that Alec would give way, made Alec shiver within.

A broken sob emanated from his throat while Alec sat back on his heels, his blade falling unnoticed to the ground with a loud clunk. It was the first time since he had lunged himself at Jace that he started to think. To really think about what he was doing. What if this was the final push to truly separate them? What if he drove Jace out of his world for real and forever? Alec stared at Jace, too scared to move, too scared to talk. He just couldn’t lose Jace completely. His safe haven. His center of the world. His everything.

Before the panic could take over fully, Jace sat up to cup his face. “Alec.” Before his name fully left Jace’s mouth, Alec felt Jace’s lips on his. For a second, Alec’s world stopped. He couldn’t react. He couldn’t kiss back. He could only sit there, another sob tearing out of his throat. And then Jace’s lips were gone as quick as they had come, leaving the taste of copper and honey behind, of salt and a promise.

“I cannot be when we are not on the same side, Alec.”

And Alec couldn’t be in such a world either. It was unthinkable, and yet, it had nearly happened. Or had it already happened?

When Alec stared at Jace, without being able to give an answer, Jace just leaned in again, bridging the gap between them. This time he pressed his lips more determinedly on Alec’s, his tongue darting out and licking over Alec’s rough lips; his teeth finding their way in his bottom lip until Alec obeyed and opened his mouth. 

It was the sign Jace had waited for. His grip to Alec’s chin got bruising, his tongue not asking for Alec’s surrender, but demanding it. And Alec just gave in to Jace. He let Jace’s tongue dart into his mouth, he gave himself fully over to this kiss. To the metallic taste of blood, to the sweetness of Jace. Just to Jace. And after long moments of just taking, Alec kissed back. Tentatively, he let his tongue explore, he let his arms go around Jace’s shoulders to steady himself and draw Jace closer.

“Jace,” Alec whispered when oxygen finally reminded them that there were other needs than kissing. 

Jace smiled in response, loosening his grip around his chin slightly, but not enough to make Alec feel uncomfortable again. Just enough to let his thumb caress Alec’s chin, down to his lips; brushing over them and pressing tenderly against them. His smile deepening when Alec opened, giving Jace the possibility to push in.

Alec started to suck immediately, not caring for the blood and the dirt, not caring that he had never done any of this ever before. He just wanted this moment to never stop, he wanted it to stretch to eternity. But of course, the moment shattered the instant this thought crossed Alec’s mind with the sound of arriving footsteps, with faint battle noise and yells and screams.

“We need to go, Alec.” Jace looked at Alec, as if to contemplate if Alec really would come with him. But the time when Alec would go against Jace was over. It hurt to see the doubt in Jace’s eyes after they had just kissed like that. Like the kiss had mattered. Like he and Jace mattered again.

Alec stumbled to his feet, his hand fumbling for the blade that had fallen to the floor. Instead of answering, he just nodded. Not knowing if Jace saw the movement or not.

“Follow me.” With that, Jace rushed to the door without looking back, without checking if Alec really followed. But of course, he did.

* * *

Jace couldn’t look back. He knew that Alec followed, he felt it in their bond, but he also _knew_ it. And he just couldn’t look back, because if he did, he would be right all over Alec again. Screw the approaching Clave soldiers, screw the fight, screw everything. If he looked at Alec’s kiss-swollen lips or the faint marks his fingers had left behind on his chin - if he just looked at Alec again - he wouldn’t be able to control himself. And though he didn’t care so much about himself, he couldn’t risk Alec being caught. Alec was his world and he had made Alec forget this for a while. But he wouldn’t let his world get harmed because of his recklessness and his strange need to help Clary.

He couldn’t quite explain why he had felt that urge – he still did – but this incident clearly told him that he had gone too far. Way too far. Clary was a project, for lack of a better word, whereas Alec was everything. And he would make sure to show Alec that he truly meant it. Show him what everything entailed.

Ever since the memory demon, his repressed feelings for his Parabatai had strived to the surface, ignoring his attempts to shove them back under as he had done before. But this time, they had been too strong to be ignored. This time, they had made him kiss Alec in probably the worst possible moment; in the middle of a real fight in hostile territory. The slight ache in his nose that still remained, even though he had activated his Iratze, together with the faint taste of blood in his mouth reminded him of their fight.

But he wouldn’t give any of it up, especially not the taste in his mouth. Because he could still taste Alec. He could still feel the rough texture of Alec’s lips, the hotness of his mouth, the sweetness of his tongue. Jace knew there was no way back now. If he was honest, there had never been another way than towards Alec. The moment he had seen him, the need to impress Alec had been there. Not to show off his skills. But to show off himself. To make the other boy see that he was there and worth something. And to his utmost surprise, Alec _had_ seen. He had not seen his skills, his cockiness, his attitude. He had seen _him._ The boy behind all that. For the first and probably last time, someone had seen him and liked him for that.

And Jace had fallen. First so slowly that he had not even realized it, just like one didn’t realize that the earth spun around the sun. But over the years he had fallen faster and faster, until even he couldn’t ignore it any longer. But he had been too afraid to ruin the one good thing in his life to act on it. Until now. Knowing how Alec’s lips felt when they moved against his own, knowing what he tasted like – there was just no other way than ahead. Together, this time.

Jace hated that they had to meet up with the others and go back to the Institute together. He hated that he couldn’t pull Alec close and reassure him that he had meant every kiss, every touch, every _Alec_. He hated that they had to hide and that this was probably what they would have to do from now on. But at least he was good at hiding. They both were.

* * *

The way back to the Institute, together with Clary and Izzy, took forever. And Alec hated every minute of it. He hated how Jace didn’t look at him once, how he chose the diagonal seat in the subway, how he just avoided him in general. For a brief moment, Alec had hoped to be allowed to have it all. To have Jace back, not only as his Parabatai, but also as his lover. But it seemed it had all been a game to Jace. A game to make Alec compliant, and the worst thing was, it had worked.

Without being able to stop, his knee started to bump up and down. Alec’s nails dug deep into his palms to contain himself. He knew he was going to see moon-shaped marks later there. His eyes were fixed on the dirty ground of the train when he felt Jace’s gaze on him.

“What?” Alec sounded annoyed and accusing, but he couldn’t help it. Jace had played him in the worst way possible.

Instead of answering, Jace looked at him for a second longer then turned his head and stared out of the window into the darkness.

Alec was first to jump off the train. This time it was him who left without checking to see if someone followed. He pushed through the crowd with huge steps, his shoulders tense and square. But he felt that Jace was on his heels. Again without saying a single word though.

When Alec entered the Institute, all he wanted to do was to rush to his room and curl up in his bed. Without waiting to learn what the others were up to, he headed towards it. He opened the door, but before he could close it, he was already pushed toward it with such force that his head smacked against it. He found his hands in an iron grip pinned next to his head, Jace pressing one knee between his thighs to force him to open them. Alec’s breathing was ragged, as if he had trained or fought; it had been ragged since he had gotten off that train. His pulse was racing, he felt his blood beating feverishly against Jace’s hands that held him firmly in place. Jace must certainly feel it as well, but instead of loosening his grip, Jace just pushed him harder against the door.

“Shh, I’ve got you, Alec. I’m here now. I’m sorry for not being here before. But I am here now. I’ve got you now.”

The more Jace pushed, the calmer Alec grew. He felt Jace again. He felt him right in front of him, with his knee between his legs, their hips pressed together, and his hands pinned to the door. He felt his power, his strength – he felt his longing. He felt safe.

“That’s it, Alec, just let me have you. I’m here. And I’ll never go anywhere ever again.” With that, Jace’s hands left Alec’s wrists, but Alec could feel the ghost of his fingerprints on them. He was sure to see marks tomorrow and Alec loved the idea of that. Before he could think further, Jace’s hands were back on him. Jace enveloped Alec’s face and a second later Jace’s lips were on his; stopping his world once again for a second, before it spun faster than it ever had. But Alec was not afraid of the spinning. He embraced it like he embraced Jace, opening his lips to let Jace take possession of him.

Jace tasted less coppery, and all the more sweet. And even though Alec hadn’t thought it possible, Jace kissed him even more possessively than back in the Silent City. More demandingly, more wantonly. Jace’s teeth scraped along his inner cheeks, his tongue devoured his mouth, and all Alec could do was take it and moan into it.

While Jace kissed him, he let his fingers run over Alec’s face, over the now visible and tangible stubble, over the Deflect rune Jace could map out in his sleep for he had been the one who placed it on Alec’s neck so many years ago. Over the spot where the rune hit his collarbone, back to Alec’s throat, and over his moving Adam’s apple. The moment Jace closed his hand around his throat, Alec got even calmer. With the same trust Jace showed him when he held the blade at his throat, Alec let himself fall. Fall into the kiss, into the exploring other hand that wandered further down his body, into Jace’s taste and smell. And foremost, into the pressure of Jace’s hand clasped around his throat, keeping him steady and safe.

Alec felt Jace smile between his kissing when his body went completely pliant under his attention. When Jace drew back a little, Alec’s lips felt just as swollen and hot as Jace’s looked. But Jace didn’t stop for long. He kissed his way from Alec’s mouth to his jaw, to his ear, nipping gently at his earlobe before he bit down a little, making Alec moan a little loader. Jace licked and sucked, altering little bites with gentle caressing.

“On our way back here, all I wanted to do was this.” Jace pressed more kisses to all the possible and impossible places on Alec’s face and neck. “I couldn’t even look at you without wanting to pin you against the closest wall.” Jace murmured before he sucked on Alec’s throat, just next to his fingers, that still held Alec in a firm but loving grip.

The sucking started to tingle, but soon the pressure increased until it was bordering on painful. Instead of pulling away, Alec leaned into the sensation. He wanted, no, he _needed_ more of this. More of Jace, more of his lips and tongue, and even more of the pain.

He couldn’t help but suck in his belly to give Jace more room when Jace’s other hand roamed over his abs to dive deeper, to shove into his jeans without bothering to unbutton them. Alec couldn’t help the gasp when Jace’s hand found his already half-hard cock and started to palm him through his underwear, the thin fabric allowing him a delicious taste of what was to come when finally all barriers were gone and only naked skin was left.

“Have you done this before?” Probably Alec shouldn’t ask because he was fairly sure that Jace had and he was also sure that he didn’t really want to hear it. But somehow, he had to know. Because he hadn’t done any of it. He had never kissed someone before, never felt lips on his skin, never bucked his hips into an exploring hand to get all the friction he was allowed to get. Never done more, not even in his wildest dreams.

“No.” Jace’s answer came promptly and without hesitation. “Because you’re the first that matters, Alec.” He pressed a kiss to his ear. “You are the first I want to kiss until you don’t know your name anymore, but mine.” Jace nipped at his earlobe. “You’re the first I want to _make_ mine. You’re my first in every way that counts.” Jace licked a wet stripe down his jawline. “You’re my first love, and you’ll be my last, Alec. You’re the first I want to mark and claim for everyone to see that you belong to me and I to you.”

Before Alec could answer, before he could truly comprehend what Jace was saying, Jace’s lips were on his again, coaxing his mouth open easily. Jace increased the pressure to his throat lightly, while he started to palm him for real. He squeezed and used his heel to make Alec’s hips start to move and meet every movement. When Jace’s lips moved on to explore more of his face, to suck more bruises on his neck and nape, all Alec could do was beg.

“Please,” he panted, not really knowing what he was begging for.

“Please what, Alec?”

“Please do all that. Mark me. Claim me. Make me yours.” _Hold me close. Love me._

Jace pushed Alec more feverishly now against the door, his desire spiking with every word Alec was saying. “Oh, I will, Alec. If you let me, I will. Today and forever.”

The pressure to his throat, Jace’s rough and hot lips moving against his, his hand in his jeans that were becoming so impossibly tight, but foremost Jace’s words and the longing Alec heard, were getting too much.

“Come for me, Alec.” It was a command but also a permission and, with a relieved groan emanating deep from within his throat, Alec came with a soft cry. But he was not embarrassed for coming so early and into his pants. He still felt safe in Jace’s embrace.

Jace held him until he stopped shaking, stroking him gently, kissing him but giving him also time to breathe.

“Let’s get you on the bed.” Jace hooked one finger through his belt loop and pulled him along, until Jace fell backwards on the bed, pulling Alec on top of him. For a moment they looked at each other before Alec leaned in to close the small gap between them to kiss Jace, sloppy and dreamy, until all of a sudden the kiss turned heated again.

* * *

Jace tugged impatiently on Alec’s shirt. He needed to feel more of Alec now. He wanted to see him, for real this time. Of course, he had seen Alec naked countless times, he had even touched nearly every inch of his body. To put battle runes on him, to heal the cuts and bruises from those fights. But today he wanted to mark Alec in a different way. Today he didn’t want to heal those bruises. Today he wanted to leave them on Alec, at least for them both to see.

Alec blushed a little but gave in to his demanding hands and slipped out of his shirt. Jace saw Alec tremble slightly under his hot stare so he pulled him down again, kissing him tenderly while his fingers worked the button of Alec’s jeans open. He pulled them, together with Alec’s boxers, down over his ass, taking his time to knead Alec’s ass cheeks while doing so, relishing the small gasp that escaped Alec while he his fingers explored his ass.

Alec’s cock was still soft and spent, but every time Jace squeezed his ass, let his nails run over his cheeks or let a finger slip into his crack but not yet touching him for real, he felt his dick twitch in anticipation. A surprised but needy sound escaped him when Jace slapped his ass once; a sound Alec would definitely deny having made. But the smug smile on Jace’s face told him that he had heard it.

“Get naked for me, Alec.” Jace grinned at him, emphasizing his command with another smack, more forceful now but still playful. Alec yelped again, feeling his cheeks warming up even more.

“Jace,” he murmured, burying his face into Jace’s nape, embarrassed by what the slaps did to him, that he got so turned on by being told what to do, and by the rougher handling.

“Shh, it’s okay, Alec. We won’t do anything you don’t like. We can stop any time.” Jace stroked his neck gently while soothing him, but Alec just shook his head. Stopping was the last thing he wanted now. He felt exposed in his current position, way more than when Jace had pressed him against the door. He had no idea how to voice what he wanted. But it seemed Jace got the message nevertheless. With a skilled move, he flipped Alec around so that he was now the one laying on top of Alec.

“Better?” Jace asked, studying Alec’s face intently, while he let his weight press Alec down. His elbows were propped next to Alec’s face as he carded soothingly through Alec’s slightly damp hair.

Indeed, it was better. Way better. Alec felt instantly calmer, being able to give Jace the control. He was definitely ready for more; he just was not ready to be the one in charge.

“Yes. So much better,” Alec breathed out, looking up at Jace through hooded eyes. “I really want this, Jace.”

“You’ll tell me to stop if you need to.” It was not a request; it was an order and Alec smiled at that. He definitely liked bossy Jace.

“Yes.” The immediate answer was rewarded by a deep kiss and more stroking, that soon merged into tugging and scratching, Jace’s nails massaging his scalp more fervently every second.

“But you are still way too dressed. I told you to get naked.” Jace smirked at him while he lifted himself off Alec, to give him the opportunity to wiggle out of his already half-way down pants and boxers.

“So good for me,” Jace praised when Alec lay completely naked under him. “Fuck Alec, you look so beautiful. Flushed, naked. Mine. But when I’m done with you, you’ll look even more like mine.” Jace’s voice was raspy with desire and want, while he looked down on Alec with hungry eyes. Jace let his hips roll forward, grinding down on Alec, making him moan when his hard cock brushed over Alec’s still sensitive, but again only half-erected cock. Jace kept circling his hips, while he explored Alec’s body further.

He took his time to kiss every part of Alec’s throat, licking over his Deflect rune, nipping at it, before he moved on to Alec’s Adam’s apple. He started with soft kisses, but soon the kisses turned into sucking and he felt Alec squirm under him. He bit lightly into the sensitive area, not to hurt, just to play. He loved to feel the movement of it when Alec swallowed against his lips and teeth.

A helpless moan escaped Alec at the sensation, the small sting adding to everything else. His cock was hard again and the constant pressure against it, the rough fabric of Jace’s jeans that he still wore drove Alec nearly mad. Together with Jace’s lips, sucking at his Adam’s apple, one of the most vulnerable spots he could imagine, was getting a little much again.

“Jace, please,” he got out between two moans.

Jace stopped kissing him, but his hips continued to circle, gentler now, keeping soft pressure deliciously on his cock. “What do you need, Alec?”

“I…” Alec drew in a shaky breath, while trying to figure out what he wanted. Needed. Jace lay unmoving on top of him now, his weight a reassuring reminder that everything was okay. “I need to feel you now, Jace. I want to see you. Touch you.” Jace was still completely dressed and, as much as the imbalance of that turned Alec on, he wanted equally as much for Jace to be naked now.

Jace grinned down on him, a smug smile on his lips. “Say _please_ , Alec.” The sparkle in his eyes showed that Jace was only teasing, but Alec couldn’t help the groan. His cock twitched even more at the order and he knew he was blushing.

“Fuck you.” Alec bit his lip, to hinder more moans from spilling out, when Jace positioned his hip a little differently and grind down on him once again.

“I’m not sure if this counts as _please_ , Alec. I think you should try again.” Jace sounded dead serious, but his eyes were laughing down at him, the smug smile from before deepening.

“Fuck you, Jace. _Please_.” Alec grinned back, Jace’s smile too contagious not to. To Alec’s surprise, he felt his shoulders relax when he started to smile. He hadn’t realized how tense he had become; just when the tension seeped out of his muscles he grew aware of it. 

“See, not so hard. Isn’t this much better?” Jace kissed him as a reward, incredibly pleased that he had made Alec beg, but even more pleased that Alec was pliant again, his body lax and trusting underneath him.

Quickly, he removed his clothes, sighing lowly when he had to lift his body off Alec’s. But sighing even louder when he was back on top of him, both naked now. The sensation was overwhelming. Alec’s skin felt hot and inviting against him, and when the first time his own hard cock rubbed over Alec’s with no clothing in between, he moaned helplessly.

“Fuck, Alec,” he groaned, sliding their cocks together again, the movement eased by his own pre-come that was mixed with Alec’s.

Alec just moaned deeply in response, his hips pushing against Jace to get more friction. He let his hands roam over Jace’s back, enjoying the feeling of Jace’s naked skin. He felt all muscles in Jace’s back, and his ass, working under his fingers while Jace ground down on him.

Jace was sure he could easily come like this, just from feeling Alec’s naked body pressed against his, their cocks rubbing over each other. But he wanted more. He wanted to be inside Alec completely. Without stopping his movements, he fumbled for his jeans, where he knew he had stashed a package of lube.

“Are you ready, Alec?” Jace smiled down on Alec, waiting for his answer. The teasing was gone from his voice, it was a genuine question. He knew it was Alec’s first time and he was prepared to wait if Alec wasn’t ready, though there was nothing he wanted more at the moment than to be buried balls-deep in his Parabatai.

Alec looked at the package and then at Jace, nodding vigorously. _Yes._ He had been ready years ago.

Instead of going straight to work, Jace took his time. He kissed his way down Alec’s chest and abs, sucking more marks onto him, licking over Alec’s skin, savoring the slightly salty taste. When he reached Alec’s cock, he kissed the head lightly, and when he heard Alec’s breath hitching, he sucked the tip in, just to tease Alec a little. He swirled his tongue, intoxicated by Alec’s taste, and took him in a little deeper, smiling around Alec’s cock. All Alec could do was voice a desperate _fuck._

“Next time,” Jace promised, when he pulled off Alec’s cock again and heard Alec’s little whine. He wanted Alec to come when he was inside him. And he needed to be inside Alec. Right fucking now.

He settled down between Alec’s legs and nudged him lightly, to spread his legs wider, but also to make him pull up his knees so that Jace had even better access to Alec’s hole. He ripped the package of lube open with his teeth, applying a generous amount to his fingers. He bent down to kiss Alec on his belly, before he started to circle Alec’s entrance, giving him time to adjust to being touched there.

When he felt Alec relax against his finger, he started to push in. He moaned when he saw his finger vanish into Alec’s hole, the muscle slowly but steadily giving in to his demanding finger. _Fuck._ Alec felt so good around him, he couldn’t imagine how he would feel stretched wide around his cock. Alec’s own moan told Jace that he could go further. He started to retreat his finger, just to push it back in again, this time a little deeper and a little faster. Soon he found a rhythm that left Alec panting heavily, small sounds of pleasure spilling out of his mouth.

Carefully he worked a second finger inside Alec, spreading them lightly to stretch Alec and prepare him for more. Alec’s moans became a little tainted with pain, but when Jace crooked his fingers to find Alec’s prostate and pressed against it, pleasure took over again. The third finger stretched Alec even wider. Appreciatively Jace let another finger roam over Alec’s strained rim. The way his fingers vanished into Alec’s ass looked incredibly hot.

“You’re taking it so well, Alec. Do you think you are ready for my cock?” Jace murmured, while spreading his fingers a little wider to scissor Alec out more thoroughly.

“Fuck, yes, Jace. Please.” Alec sounded wrecked and Jace loved the tone of that. He loved hearing the _please_ he had not asked for but got nevertheless.

With a grin he removed his fingers, chuckling lightly when Alec whimpered needily at the loss.

Alec’s whimper turned into a moan of pleasure when he felt Jace’s blunt head on his entrance.

“Breathe, Alec,” Jace whispered into his ear. “Let me in. Just breathe.” And Alec did just that. He released the breath he had been holding and relaxed. When Jace pushed in, it hurt a little. He felt his hole stretch wider than ever before to accommodate for Jace’s cock. He felt split open and pushed to a limit he thought, until now, impossible. It burned, but not in a bad kind of way. The burn was underlined by a pleasure he had never felt before. When Jace stopped moving, Alec groaned in frustration. He needed more now. It still burned, but he didn’t care. He wanted more of the sensation of Jace moving inside him. More of the way he felt split open, in order to let Jace in. The same way his soul had been slit open to let a piece of Jace’s soul in, so many years back.

Jace moaned when he felt Alec’s need through their bond. And of course, he couldn’t deny Alec this. So he pulled out, just to thrust in again, a little deeper this time. They both groaned when, with each thrust, Jace buried himself a little deeper and Alec got a little softer, giving in to Jace, welcoming him into his body a little more.

When Jace started to angle his movements, to hit Alec’s prostate, it got too much. The sensation was overwhelming. Alec cried out helplessly, his hands reaching for Jace to find support. His body tensed and Jace became still above him, not moving but staying inside him.

“Shh, I’ve got you, Alec. I’m here.” Jace bent down to Alec, his hand closing around Alec’s throat again, his thumb running over his Adam’s apple. Massaging it, before he closed his hand to press down.

Instantly, Alec felt himself getting calmer. He felt Jace’s weight more now; with him, leaning more on him. His hand around his throat was not a threat. On the contrary, it was a reassurance. That Jace was there and was taking care of him, and that he was Jace’s. He felt his whole body go pliant once again and he started to move his hips, pushing into Jace to make him move again.

Jace waited a few seconds longer but then he complied. He started to thrust again, his hips snapping forward, finding the old rhythm again. But this time he stayed down, his body encaging Alec’s and his hand never leaving Alec’s throat. He didn’t cut off his airway; he just left his hand there to hold Alec in a firm grip. To make him feel safe.

Each thrust buried him a little deeper into Alec until, with each shove, he felt his balls slap against Alec’s ass. He was close and he felt that Alec was too.

“Can you come like this?” Jace panted, not wanting to remove his hand from Alec’s throat, and needing his other to support himself. But also needing Alec to come.

Alec just made an indistinctive noise, lost for words. Each thrust made his eyes roll back into his head, the feeling of Jace being inside him was completely overwhelming. He was close, he just needed a little bit more.

Jace picked up his pace, pulling out nearly completely until only his tip was left before slamming back into Alec again right away, aiming for Alec’s prostate every time. When Jace knew he couldn’t hold on any longer, he thrust into Alec one last time, opening his side of the bond fully and tightening his grip around Alec’s throat.

The forceful thrust to his prostate made Alec scream, but he was cut off by Jace’s hand that squeezed him tightly. This, together with the feeling of Jace’s orgasm, rolling over him through their bond, made Alec come undone. With a muffled moan he came, untouched, and with a force that nearly made him black out.

Jace collapsed on top of Alec, staying inside him, his hands cupping Alec’s face now. He kissed Alec softly on the mouth, on his eyes, on his cheeks, just everywhere, while he murmured soft nothings into his ear, waiting for Alec to stop shaking. Waiting for himself to stop shaking. “I love you, Alec.”

Alec looked up at him with wide eyes. “I love you too, Jace. So much.”

They kissed until Alec started to squirm. “You’re getting heavy.”

Jace huffed indignantly. “I’m not heavy.”

Alec just laughed and pressed a kiss to Jace’s nose. “I didn’t say you _are_ , but that you _get_. Move.”

“You know, I liked you better before. When you begged and said _please_.” Jace’s deep smile contradicted his words. He pushed himself up, groaning when he slipped out of Alec.

“Maybe later you can have me like that again.” Alec blushed, but he held Jace’s gaze while propping himself on his elbows.

Jace grinned at him, mapping out the bruises he had left on Alec. “Mmm, I certainly hope so. There is so much skin left without any marks.” He kissed Alec possessively before he left the bed, heading towards the bathroom to get a warm washcloth.

When he came back, Alec was already half asleep. Jace smiled at the sight and hurried to snuggle close to Alec, cleaning him gently in the process. He wrapped his arms around Alec and pressed a kiss to his nape. Alec hummed contentedly, pushing a little closer into Jace until his back was completely pressed against Jace’s chest. Embraced like this, feeling warm, safe and loved, he let sleep claim him. Just like he had before let Jace claim him.

When Alec woke up, he lay splayed over Jace’s chest, his head resting in his nape. Jace was already awake, but not making any moves to get up. He had one arm slung around Alec’s waist, to press him close; the other was caressing Alec.

Alec just stayed where he was, enjoying the soothing strokes on his back, the combing through his hair. He enjoyed the feeling of being fully embraced by Jace. He loved the gentle touches, together with the possessive way Jace held him close so that he had nowhere to go. He could lay here forever with Jace and just forget the world. Jace had blown his world into pieces anyway. He had put it back together. But this time not with just himself in the middle. This time, with the two of them.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos are loved 💙


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